Rebuked, Restored and Encouraged.

     Sometimes I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep. To keep on having good times and wonderful memories [in my dreams] so I can escape the reality and the troubles I am facing right now. My lack of drive in doing things is getting worse but deep within me, there is a voice telling me, 'everyone is going through a tough time once in a while', and I was like I can accept it if that is the case but for me it's been going on for years now and how long will I struggle to see and taste my sweet victory? My heart is breaking into pieces as I face these obstacles day after day I would cry unto God asking for answers, comfort, strength and direction. I can only get comfort and strength but the direction and answers that I’m hoping for is concealed from my understanding. It made me ask, is it because of my sins that I can no longer hear His voice or is it because the Holy Spirit had departed from me for my inequities. Either way, I still want to know. As I ask God, He gave me this verse;

As for God, his way is perfect: 

    The Lord’s word is flawless; 

    he shields all who take refuge in him.

                      -Psalm 18:30

The law of the Lord is perfect, 

    refreshing the soul. 

The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, 

    making wise the simple.

                         -Psalm 19:7

     It struck me so hard and really felt shame. All along I've been questioning God why these things are happening to me, to my family? God told me to trust Him and in my mind I’m telling Him, “It’s hard and am I not trusting You enough?” Then I got another question realizing I am still uncertain of my future, “How can I possibly trust You God when I can’t even understand a thing? Why won’t you let me know?” He then answer me through this verse,

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;

    I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.

 Do not be like the horse or the mule,

    which have no understanding

but must be controlled by bit and bridle 

    or they will not come to you.

                            -Psalm 32:8-9

     Once again, I got nothing to say but, “Sorry,GOD.” I am being a stubborn daughter again by demanding God for answers before I obey. I always wanted to make sure of the outcome and that is the real example of one who doesn’t trust God because when you trust Him, you will obey even if you think that it doesn't make any sense and at the end of it all you can attest that “The Lord’s will is good, pleasing and perfect will.”

     I was rebuked, restored, strengthen and encouraged by His word. Through that conversation with God and the movie Facing the giants, I got a new revelation from Him, "the tough times will soon be over as I obey His word and trust Him even when it doesn’t make any sense because He is true to His promises and nothing is impossible with Him".

God doesn't want us to just wait 'til things are over but He wants us to keep a good fight of faith. So don't give up, trust every promises that He has in your heart because each of us is being trained for the greater glory of His name.